Ever since I was a little girl I have wanted to be a Mom, it is one of the only things that I have wanted consistently my whole life. Then September 2, 2012 my wish was granted after about 3 years of not so patient waiting. I promised myself that I would be the Mom that I always imagined I would be, one that I always wanted and needed in my own life. And for a while I was. Wesson is a four year old tornado of energy. He is loving and full of attitude. Everything is in extremes. He is everything that I am not, he isn’t afraid to tell you what he thinks, he will not be one to let people walk all over him. He is wild and adventurous, my mini super hero that is going to save the world. When I imagined myself as a Mom I imagined a mom with patience, who made healthy meals and had a well- mannered little man and a good routine. I totally have been the person who said when I am a mom my kids won’t act like this. (insert major eye roll) what a joke. I can’t tell you how many times I have gotten the look from people shaking their heads at Wesson’s behavior, even from friends and family. Being a Mom is the hardest job. You can feel under- appreciated, sometimes a bit crazy, exhausted to the point you don’t know how you can make it, embarrassed, like a failure. I can’t tell you how many times I have felt like a failure in the past 4 years. Moms are judged super harshly which makes it even harder because I know a lot of us are hard enough on ourselves. I am a person that puts a lot of pressure on myself and if I am not doing something that I think I should be doing right I come down hard on myself. There are so many things that you have to do, milestones you feel like you have to meet or you’re not doing something right. It is hard to enjoy things when your head is always spinning around trying to find what’s up and what’s down. Especially the younger years, trust me I know. I am at home with not just my little man but also 6 other little people and some days it's a lot. I can't tell you how many times I have gone to bed in tears feeling like I just am not cut out for this. Motherhood isn't for the weak but it is worth it. It is the most important job there is. But sometimes at the end of the day you wonder if you are enough, are you good enough, are you doing enough. It’s easy lose yourself, in the midst of all the craziness.
Children are amazing little creatures when you really think about it. They go from tiny babies trying to absorb all these pieces of information to these little balls of insurmountable energy with full personalities and their own thoughts. They are the only stranger you know you will meet that will be the love of your life. They can drive you to the brink of insanity and then pull you back with just a kiss or an I love you. I cannot tell you how thankful I am to be Wesson's Mom. I know someday he is going to do amazing things. Until then though he is mine to push my buttons, make me laugh uncontrollably, and do all the great and not so great things a mom goes through. There are so many wonderful things about being a mom they bring you unbelievable amounts of joy, so many tears good and bad, maybe a few grey hairs and wrinkles. Childhood goes by in a flash and I don't want to miss out because I was so hard on myself.
Thank you to my little man Wesson James for making me a mom, making my dreams come true.
So, in case no one has told you, you are doing an amazing job. If you are a working Mom, stay at home Mom, step Mom, foster Mom we are all in this together. At the end of the day they aren’t going to be little forever so cherish these moments as much as you can. Give yourself a break, stop putting so much pressure on yourself. Be involved, be present really present. Get in the pictures (something I am working on myself) Happy Mother’s Day ladies, I hope your day is fantastic and you are reminded of just how much you do!
You made it through to the end! Thank so much for taking the time! As a thank you to all you awesome hard working Mama's I have a super secret surprise (everyone who likes and shares this post will be entered to win a free session!) The only rule is you have to like Stephanie Reinhardt Photography Page and Like and Share this post.